MISSION: Gay & Sober's mission is simple – to provide a safe, fun, and enriching experience to the sober LGBTQ community. Our primary purpose is to encourage unity and enhance one’s sobriety.
The nonprofit organization was started because we found that crystal meth was impacting the community at an alarming scale. We realize that there is a direct correlation with drug use and HIV infection rates amongst gay and queer men and others in the LGBTQ+ community. We also determined that LGBTQ+ people were struggling with getting sober and staying sober from alcohol and drugs.
Our aim is to create a safe space for LGBTQ+ people to gather in-person and online for health & wellness, educational recovery programming, and fun social activities. In addition to that, our face to face in-person gatherings create community and connections with people that otherwise feel isolated. Particularly with individuals from remote places where there is not a large LGBTQ+ support community.
VISION: In the spirit of unity we come together to support and love one another and to show others – especially beginners – that it is indeed possible to be happy, joyous, & free in sobriety. We offer year-round health and wellness programing, education, and events. Once a year, we hold a special event in New York City devoted to celebrating recovery from alcoholism & drug addiction. For three special days, hundreds of fellows are brought together for a weekend of innovative health & wellness workshops, big speaker meetings, spiritual growth, and top entertainment. We also sponsor a Pride Day celebration for all LGBTQ people that provides a safe space to march in the parade and an evening dance on the Hudson River - complete with fireworks!
Our conference participants represent multiple 12 step programs and diverse paths to recovery. People come from all corners of the world. For those of you familiar with the experience of the former Hot N Dry or of a YPAA event, you're going to love the energy we offer!
SPIRIT: We are doing this in the spirit of brotherhood, friendliness, fellowship, and adventure!
"To watch people recover, to see them help others, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a fellowship grow up about you, to have a host of friends - this is an experience you must not miss. We know you will not want to miss it."
- pg. 89, Basic Text
ORIGINS: What started as a private group on Facebook called Gay & Sober Men in the summer of 2009, Gay & Sober has mushroomed into what is now the largest recovery group of its kind on social media. Gay & Sober has expanded to offer nightly online meetings, monthly free LGBTQ community programming, a conference, and an official component in national pride festivities. Gay & Sober, the umbrella nonprofit organization that operates and oversees the conference holds regular meetings of AA, and is a part of the fellowship - however we welcome and embrace members and friends from all fellowships - including the fellowships of Narcotics Anonymous, Crystal Meth Anonymous and AL-Anon and secular recovery.**
OUR WORK: Gay & Sober sponsors its main events during Pride Weekend in New York City and satellite events in Tennessee, and Florida. Gay & Sober will have a presence at the Canal Parade during Amsterdam Pride. InterPride has invited Gay & Sober to create safe and fun sober spaces at all WorldPrides through 2027. In addition to in-person events, Gay & Sober provides free online recovery resources and virtual community 365 days a year.
Currently we are blessed to have over 100 sober volunteers from 10 countries. We invite you to help us so we can in turn help others! To get involved, please visit the Planning page.
To donate, please click here
In June of 2011, a nonprofit company titled Queer & Sober conducted a three day fellowship event on Pride Weekend in New York - including a cruise on Pride Sunday. Under the direction of Christian P., Keith B., David C., and Jackson S., Queer & Sober operated from 2011 through 2013. In July of 2013, Queer & Sober closed, but the tradition of something wonderful on Pride Weekend was in full swing. In October of 2014, the men's event Hot 'n Dry in Palm Springs announced that it would hold it's farewell convention in September of 2015. Christian being an admin of the of the Facebook group saw a unique opportunity to launch a new, reimagined adventure. In June of 2015, the members of Gay & Sober Men's Facebook group voted almost unanimously to meet face to face at it's very first conference. Where and when was the next big question. Destination cities like Philadelphia, Washington DC, and New York immediately came to mind. In January of 2016, the group voted and announced that it would hold the conference in New York City and it would coincide with Pride Weekend. In March of 2016, Jerry X. from the Big Apple Roundup announced on Facebook that after 30 years on Thanksgiving Weekend, the Big Apple Roundup would be moving from Thanksgiving weekend to Pride Weekend.
*The big annual meeting at the Gay & Sober Men's Conference is recognized by the Association of Gays & Lesbians in Alcoholics Anonymous (GaL-AA.org). Gay & Sober Inc. is a tax exempt 501c3 New York State nonprofit. All donations and contributions are tax deductible. In the spirit of cooperation, Gay & Sober sponsored AA, AL-ANON, and CMA meetings donate and support AA, AL-ANON, and CMA, respectively. A separate 7th Tradition collection is taken at each big nightly conference meeting and sent directly to AA or CMA. There are no paid positions at Gay & Sober Inc. The entire organization is operated by volunteers. If you would like to see Gay & Sober's financial statement, please send an email to contact@gayandsober.org.
**Gay & Sober Inc. is operated by the LGBT members of AA & CMA. All are welcome. The organization serves people from both fellowships. The organization sponsors an annual fellowship conference based on our program of recovery and provides opportunities for fellowship throughout the year. We strive to adhere to the guidelines and principles set forth by the 12 Steps, 12 Traditions, as well as the guidelines for conferences, conventions, and roundups. Our events are created for AA's & CMA's, by AA's & CMA's. Like many local Alano clubs and LGBT Community Centers, our corporation supports a variety of 12 Step programs.
Gay & Sober Inc. is not associated with the Big Apple Roundup Inc. Gay & Sober Inc. and Big Apple Roundup Inc. are both autonomous and separate business entities. As described in the long form of AA’s 3rd Tradition, and like meetings at other Roundups, the main AA meeting at the GSM Conference by group conscious declares and considers itself an AA group. As such, the AA meeting at the Gay & Sober Conference makes Special Contributions annually to support the work of Alcoholics Anonymous. Questions concerning our financial support can be directed to the Alcoholics Anonymous Contributions Department at 212-870-3400. The same can be said for Crystal Meth Anonymous World Services.
Big Apple Roundup is listed by AA as holding bi-weekly meetings at 208 W 13th St on the 1st Thursday and 3rd Sunday of every month. Questions concerning the Big Apple Roundup can be addressed to these meetings. The General Service Office of Alcoholics Anonymous has informed Gay & Sober that they do not have the authority to recognize any annual conference meetings, groups or roundups. A directory listing does not imply approval or endorsement of any group’s approach to or practice of the traditional AA program. The last Big Apple Roundup event was in June of 2019. It has since dissolved
RELEVANT INFORMATION TO COMMON QUESTIONS:
*This event can be announced anywhere other roundups are announced.
The first three days of the conference is devoted to gay men in recovery.
On Pride Sunday all LGBTQ people are invited to participate.
Gay & Sober and it's special conference is not associated with the nonprofit business entity
Big Apple Roundup.
*Gay & Sober Men - The Conference is a 12 Step fellowship event.
*As described in the long form of AA's 3rd Tradition, and like meetings at other Roundups, the main AA meetings at the GSM Conference by group conscious declares itself an AA group. There is a separate 7th Tradition and that collection is donated to the AA General Service Office. To see proof from AA GSO, click here.
*As described in the long form of CMA's 3rd Tradition, and like meetings at other Roundups or Retreats, the main CMA meetings at the GSM Conference by group conscious declares itself an CMA group. There is a separate 7th Tradition and that collection is donated to the CMA World Services.
THIS CAN BE ANNOUNCED IN MEETINGS.
FOR MORE INSIGHT, SEE THE MISSION PAGE
1. GSM offers AA meetings with invited AA speakers and AA participants..
2. GSM also offers CMA meetings with invited CMA speakers and CMA participants. .
3. Gay & Sober meets regularly and has meetings of the same name.
4. "Any two or three gathered in the name of sobriety may consider themselves a group."
5. 7th Tradition collections are donated to AA GSO and CMA World respectively.
6. Just like the LGBT Center, Gay & Sober is also a 501c3 nonprofit that facilitates and fosters 12 step work, meetings, and fellowship. Unlike the LGBT Center, there are no paid positions at Gay & Sober. It is run solely by unpaid, passionate volunteers.